


Dreamers Awake

by Breac_Rosetta



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F, Gem Egg Hell, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-21
Updated: 2016-01-21
Packaged: 2018-05-15 03:17:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5769283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Breac_Rosetta/pseuds/Breac_Rosetta
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She needs to tell her mistress, but she doesn't know how.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dreamers Awake

She needs to tell her mistress. Her hands tremble at the thought, her fingers digging inwards on herself. She stands still, as she was taught, as she always does, at her mistress' side. She holds her clasped hands up her chest and says nothing. The court is busy today. Gems moving about their business, laughing and scowling and talking, making wild gestures and moving quickly past. She is afraid that someone will notice. As each Gem walks past, she is terrified something is going to give her secret away. The slight tremble in her hands or the way her eyes dart beneath her wavy blue hair. Perhaps someone will notice in a way she doesn't, pointing and howling at her in a fit of disgusted fury. She lets her eyes dart over to Blue Diamond, her mistress. She needs to tell her. Instead, she clasps her hands tighter and says nothing.

They are alone that night. Her mistress takes her to her private quarters and beckons her over. She lies flat on her back as her mistress's eyes go over her. She has to tell her mistress, but she doesn't know how. Blue Diamond leans down, her veil falling over the both of them. She used to love this moment; it had always felt like the rest of the world evaporated, just leaving the two of them. Her mistress kisses her on the forehead, brushes the hair away from her eyes, then stops. The tears have welled up in Pearl's eyes, streaking down the sides of her face.

"What's wrong, my Pearl?" Blue Diamond murmurs.

She reaches a shaky hand up to her chest, touching her Gem, then lets her hand trail downwards, resting on her belly. She silently pleads with her mistress to realize what has happened. Blue Diamond's eyes jolt wide in perfect understanding. She raises herself back up, eyes once again hidden under her veil.

"I'm sorry, mistress," Blue Pearl whimpers.

"What's done is done." Her mistress says simply.

"This will be hard on your body." Blue Diamond continued. "Do you really want this?"

Pearl stared at her mistress in silent confusion and worry. She didn't know how to answer. Blue Diamond's expression softened.

"I'm not angry with you, my Pearl. I have no qualms against this happening. Do you?"

"No," she replied after a time. Blue Diamond nodded.

"Then we have much work to do."

Blue Diamond excused herself from court the next day. She was weary, she claimed, and desired respite alone. She would return in due time and left her duties to the remaining Diamonds. No one questioned the fact that her Pearl would come with her. She is invisible, uncounted, and for that Blue Pearl is deeply grateful. They warp down to Earth and begin their trek, Blue Diamond on her palanquin and Blue Pearl walking at her mistress's side. Blue Pearl doesn't know where they are going and doesn't ask. She keeps her hands gracefully folded in front of her, walks smoothly and silently, and tries not to think of the weight resting in her core.

They are on a mountain path, somewhere high up. Pinkish clouds drift along, obscuring all but the tops of surrounding peaks. She can see the outline of something floating off in the distance. The path to their destination is long and winding. Eventually they stop upon reaching a series of small, floating pillars of earth. Just past the pillars is their destination. The Sky Spire. The palanquin leaps nimbly from pillar to pillar, and Blue Pearl follows suit.

The Sky Spire is only half-finished. The dome on the ceiling and part of the wall leading outside are missing. Outside, the spire is surrounded by a pool of water, with a pathway leading from the spire to a smaller, circular platform. Eventually a smaller version of the spire will go here, but for now it is empty. A breeze rushes past, sending a ripple through the still water of the pool. They will be left alone here. No one can approach without them knowing. The palanquin comes to rest at the center of the spire and Blue Diamond turns to her Pearl.

"We shall stay here until you are fit to return. You may wander the spire as you please."

Blue Pearl turns to her mistress and feels the tears begin to well up in her eyes again. She's never been skilled at speaking. Raw emotion runs through her and it's always been hard to find a way to distill it into some kind of sentiment she can share. She is overwhelmed at everything that has happened and struggles to find a way to express it.

"I'm sorry for making you do this," she finally whispers.

Blue Diamond chuckles once at this.

"Make me? You haven't made me do anything. I desired to do this, and so it was done."

Blue Pearl nods once and turns to look out onto the horizon. Blue Diamond is right. It's not possible that she, a Pearl, could ever make her mistress do something she didn't want to do. But still, for her mistress to make all this effort for her...

She's always existed on the sidelines, watching court life go by and speaking to no one but her mistress. It's how she's always lived, and it's exactly how she wants to live. She enjoys being a silent spectator, existing in the background as great things hurry and whirl around her. It's all upside down now. She wonders what the future will hold, but Blue Pearl can only do what's she's always done. Wait and see.

*****

The days and nights slowly meld together out on the spire. Blue Pearl stands gracefully, as she was taught, and watches the world drift past in silence, as she always does. The world is quiet here. The clouds drift idly past the mountain peaks during the day, and at night foreign stars turn slowly overhead. The only time the silence is broken is when a rare flock of birds fly past. Her mistress is a patient Gem, but she still has her limits. One day Blue Diamond beckons her over.

"I desire a diversion, my Pearl."

She nods in assent and makes her way out onto the platform, surrounded by the pool. It is a bright, clear day with a faint breeze. The sun catches each ripple in the water, imbuing each little wave that rises up with a brief shimmer of light. She doesn't have nearly so much power as other Gems, but it's enough to entertain her mistress. She stands gracefully on the platform as her mistress watches from the spire. She flicks her wrist and dozens of watery figures rise from the pool. They all begin to dance, back and forth, spinning and twirling as small jets of water rise and fall amongst them. The watery figures continue their dance until the sun drops down on the horizon.

Sometimes her mistress will beckon her and she will enter the palanquin, drawn into the soft kisses and gentle caresses of Blue Diamond. Her mistress runs her hand in slow circles around the faintly rounded surface of her abdomen.

"You're showing already," Blue Diamond murmured.

"Is that bad?" Pearl asks.

"I don't know," her mistress replies.

Sometimes her mistress leaves the spire for a time, and Blue Pearl is left to herself. Today she is sitting in the water at the edge of the pool, lost in her thoughts. Rose Quartz and her Pearl are somewhere on this planet as well. She still remembers them, back when Rose Quartz went by a different name. She remembers the way Pink Pearl used to look at her mistress and how her mistress would look back at her. She's certain that they had the same kind of affair as her mistress has with her. Now all of them are by themselves on this alien planet, alone except for each other. Are they lonely and afraid? Do they miss the court? Or does it feel like everything they've ever wanted? Perhaps that's why they chose never to come back. What if she and Blue Diamond never went back to court? What if they stayed here forever?

Blue Pearl worries it might be treasonous to think this way. She tries to think of something else instead. She runs a hand over her now-distinct bulge. On some level, it's still hard for her to wrap her head around. The idea that she's incubating eggs. Blue Diamond's eggs. But they'll all be Pearls, won't they? There has only been and can only ever be one of each Diamond. Will they be like her, or something different? Will they serve Blue Diamond alongside her? Blue Pearl's hand slips from her belly. They can't though, can they? The true depth of their affair will always need to be kept a secret. Her mistress could never risk anyone discovering the existence of their eggs. She wonders then what will happen to them once they've been laid.

When her mistress returns, Blue Pearl quickly hurries to her and bows in greeting. It doesn't take Blue Diamond long to understand that something is on her mind.

"Tell me what you are thinking, my Pearl."

She twists her hands a few times, partly in nervousness and partly as she works out her response in her mind.

"After the eggs are laid, we'll go back to court, won't we?"

Blue Diamond nodded. Pearl hesitated and twisted her hands tighter.

"Where...where will the eggs go?" She whispered.

Her mistress beckoned her closer and Blue Pearl slowly walked forward, trying to quell the tremble in her thin limbs. Her mistress took her shaking hands in her own and kissed on the top of her head.

"They will be kept safe. I promise."

*****

Standing is no longer an effortless task. She has tried to ignore it as much as she can, but the weight inside her gets larger and heavier every day. She stands at her mistress's side, as she always does, but now she also has to focus on keeping her feet from shifting and legs from wobbling. She keeps trying to focus on something besides how laden she feels when Blue Diamond turns to her and says,

"If you are tired, you may rest on the palanquin with me."

Blue Pearl snaps her head towards her mistress and stares. The palanquin her mistress brought is a recreational model. A large, circular mattress fills the middle, allowing her mistress to sit or recline as she chose. Blue Pearl stepped forward hesitantly, keeping her eyes on Blue Diamond. Despite the heaviness filling her body, she still felt a fluttering sensation as she lifted herself onto the mattress besides Blue Diamond. The palanquin was her mistress's domain. The only time she'd ever entered was when she was swept up into the embrace of Blue Diamond. As much as she loved it, it was still part of her job. She had never really been allowed to be idle, not for herself. She sat down and felt a rush of relief at being off her feet. She glanced over at her mistress again, some part of her insisting that it wasn't right for her to be sitting here like this. Blue Diamond offered a small smile before turning back to look out at the mountains.

The weeks continue to pass, and her belly continues to expand as the eggs grow inside her. She tries to stand as much as she can, but more often than not Blue Pearl finds herself sitting alongside her mistress. Sometimes they sit together in silence and watch the world go by. Sometimes her mistress tells her stories. Stories of times long before she was made, or of things her mistress has seen. Other times her mistress will talk to her about the court, and Blue Pearl answers as best she can in her slow, halting way. She knows their eggs can't be with them, but she wonders if they'll ever get the chance to visit the court once they've formed. She hopes they will.

It's mid-morning at the spire, and a flock of birds have landed in the pool. Blue Pearl and her Diamond watch the feathered creatures in silent bemusement as they drink and splash in the sun. The birds call happily to each other, and Blue Pearl can't help but think that their voices sound like music. She sways a little bit in place, the birdsong bringing to mind a dance she'd always liked.

"Can you dance for me, my Pearl?"

She turned to her mistress and blushed a bit for being lost in her head. Then she nodded and faced her mistress, bowing and then taking her favored stance. Blue Pearl leaps once, twirls, then stumbles forward as her weight throws her off balance. She has never stumbled, not once in her life. She looks at her mistress in horror. Blue Diamond shakes her head and raises a palm.

"It's alright, my Pearl. You don't have to do it."

Blue Pearl straightened herself up and tried to refocused on the birds, but she can't shake the feeling of embarrassment. She can't stand. She can't pose or dance. She's no longer small and graceful. She has spent more time sitting during these past few months than she has done in her entire life. She tries to settle the feelings fluttering around in her chest, but it's hard, harder than it's ever been. She's fond of the eggs, but that makes it even harder to grapple with how much they've impaired her. Her mistress calls her over, and Blue Pearl's shame cuts even deeper as she approaches.

"Why are you upset, my Pearl?" Blue Diamond asks softly.

"I...I failed you, mistress."

Blue Diamond shook her head again.

"You are in no condition to dance. The fault was my own."

"No!" Pearl whispered fiercely. "I can't...I can't do anything anymore. What kind of Pearl am I?"

Blue Diamond motioned for her to come closer. Once she was within reach, Blue Pearl was swept up into her mistress's arms, her body curled up against Blue Diamond's as she looked up into her mistress's piercing eyes.

"You are my Pearl," Blue Diamond murmured. "You are extraordinary."

As Pearl began to shake her head in denial, Blue Diamond shifted her into the crook of one arm and gently touched her forehead with the tip of a finger to stop her. As soon as she stopped, Blue Diamond traced her finger lower until it rested at the highest point of Blue Pearl's wide midsection.

"I told you this was going to be hard on you," Blue Diamond gently reminded her, laying her palm to rest. "You've done so well. Don't ever be ashamed of this."

Blue Pearl nodded slowly, happily, and Blue Diamond smiled down at her.

*****

It is night in the Spire. The air is still and crisp, and no clouds drift above them. They have a perfect view of the night sky as the single, pale moon shines above them. Outside the spire, the pool mirrors the heavens perfectly. Blue Pearl knows better, but it almost seems like she could go out and bathe in the inky waters of the cosmos.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Her mistress breathes quietly. Blue Pearl nods. She hopes that someday, once this rebellion is over and the Earth is a proper colony, she and her mistress will visit this place again. The Earth is a strange, fantastic planet and Blue Pearl is glad that her eggs will be incubated here. She hopes they'll enjoy this planet as much as she has.

"Can you make it better, my Pearl?" Blue Diamond asks.

Blue Pearl smiles, slips off the palanquin, and makes her way out towards the pool. She can no longer stand like she used to, so instead Blue Pearl sits on the small platform. Her legs curl under the large sweep of her belly and she raises her palms to the still water. She can't perform as she used to either; too much power has been diverted from her Gem for that. She thinks for a moment, then flicks her wrist. A large, veiled figure rises from the water, followed shortly by a petite, unveiled figure. The larger figure takes the hand of the smaller one and they slowly begin to waltz over the still carpet of stars.

They dance slowly, hands entwined and bodies pressed against each other. She makes sure the pool doesn't ripple beneath them as they step along the path of the Milky Way. Back and forth, back and forth, she becomes lost in their movements, in the way the single moon hovers above them and the clouds linger below. Two figures, all alone on an alien planet. Her mistress's reflection appears in the water, standing behind her with a smile.

They lie together in the palanquin that night. Blue Pearl is curled up in her mistress's lap, her body partially covered under Blue Diamond's veil. Above them, the stars slowly turn as the Earth completes another orbit. Her mistress slowly strokes the large swell of her belly, and Blue Pearl wishes that time would stop. She wishes this moment, this night, could last forever. Nothing but her mistress, herself, their eggs, and the sky above them. As if reading her mind, her mistress turns to look at her.

"It won't be much longer," Blue Diamond tells her, hand resting on her belly. She reaches up and rests her own small hand on her Diamond's.

"This is going to be difficult. You'll need to be brave."

Blue Pearl nods.

"I will, mistress."

Blue Diamond leans down and as Pearl is surrounded by the darkness of her Diamond's veil, she feels the soft press of lips against her own.

*****

"I'm sorry, mistress, I'm so sorry," she sobs into the folds of Blue Diamond's veil, as if her apologies were something that would matter, that could make her mistress simply wave the pain away with a flick of her wrist. She is dimly aware of the mess she is making on Blue Diamond's fine sheets, of the way she is squeezing and twisting her mistress's hand, but the only thing that stays in her mind right now is the pain wracking her body as the first egg slowly makes its way out of her.

She chokes down another sob and Blue Diamond gently brushes the disheveled hair out of her eyes, murmuring small reassurances. She looks up at Blue Diamond and catches the look of worry in her face. She tries her best to compose herself, biting her tongue and blinking back tears, but quickly falters. Her mistress leans down and kisses her forehead.

"Be strong, my Pearl. Be strong for me."

She nods once and pushes harder.

By the time the third and final egg leaves her, she is a trembling, nearly-incoherent mess. She is past exhaustion. Her body is frayed to its limit.

"I'm so, so, proud of you," her mistress murmurs as she runs her fingers through her frazzled, matted hair. Blue Pearl doesn't have the energy to respond. She looks down at the eggs resting in front of her. Twinkling, brilliant. They are the most beautiful things she has ever seen. She disappears in a puff of smoke, the sight of her eggs the last thing in her consciousness.

She's unsure of how long she has been dormant. She rises in a flash of light, billowing up and outwards, coming to rest on the floor of the temple. She rises to her feet as Blue Diamond leaves her palanquin to greet her. Instead of greeting her mistress, she looks over to the palanquin. It is empty. Blue Diamond cups her head in her hands, kneeling down to face her Pearl.

"They are hidden." Blue Diamond reassures her. "They are safe."

Blue Pearl nods slowly. A lump forms in her throat. She should be happy. Her mistress has done so much for her, and now she's kept their eggs safe too, hidden in secret somewhere on this alien world. She should be happy. She should...

The tears slowly run down her face, and Blue Pearl inwardly scolds herself for being so greedy. How could she wish for more? She's been given more than any Pearl could even dream about. But still, she wished she could have had just a little more time with them. She wished she could have held their eggs just once. She wished she had more time to take them in, to remember what they looked like before they parted.

She expects her mistress to be disgusted with and tell her how ungrateful she's being. She tries to hold everything back, but she sobs once, ugly and loud. Blue Diamond removes her hands from her Pearl's face and before Blue Pearl can respond, she pulls her tiny body flush against her own and strokes her wavy hair. Blue Pearl looks up at her mistress, but she's turned her head away, her free hand pulling her veil down farther over her face. All she can see is the slight twitch of her mistress's lips. Blue Pearl leans back into her mistress's body and allows herself one last act of luxury. She cries quietly into her mistress's robes while Blue Diamond silently strokes her hair with a shaky hand.

Eventually she regains her compose and Blue Diamond pulls away. Blue Pearl closes her eyes and recalls the brief glimpse she got of her eggs. She promises herself to make it last forever. It's all she'll ever have. She rises to her feet as Blue Diamond withdraws to her palanquin.

"It's time for us to leave this place," her mistress tells her. She nods and follows her mistress in silence down the spiral path of the Sky Spire and over the hovering pillars. At the edge of the mountain she stops and turns back to look at the spire one last time. She can see the faint glimmer of the pool in the distance.

"Pearl," her mistress calls, not unkindly. She turns back to her Diamond, away from the spire, and follows after her with hands clasped to her chest. She walks by her mistress's side as she was taught, as she always does, and always will.

 


End file.
